I hit a wall! No, not an actual outer wall of brick or concrete, but an inner wall of resistance. I’m not sure if it was the proverbial “writer’s block” or not, but one thing was certain, since last October I did not want to think about, talk about, or in any other way process anything to do with grief. As one of the writers of this blog, I needed to take a break.
Sometimes bereavement is like that. We go along in a healing mode for a while and suddenly we feel a big pout coming on. Maybe we want to be mad at God for a while about the pain of the change or loss that has happened in our life. Maybe we want other people to stop asking how we are doing as if they hope we are back to being our “normal” self again. Or maybe we just want to crawl back into bed, shut out the rest of the world, and hibernate through the next year or two.
There are times in grief recovery when the next step in our healing requires the courage to just face what is and what will never be again. It’s hard to admit to ourselves that life has probably changed forever for us. To find the energy to move forward with this realization in mind, you may have to dig deeper into your inner reserves. Here are three simple things that can help:
- Try altering your daily routine and add something to it that nurtures you a little more like music or movement.
- Pull up a good memory of the recent past and get into the feeling of it. Hold on to that good feeling as long as you can.
- Name something you are grateful for. Then name something else you are grateful for. Gratitude is a huge attitude-shifter that can lift your mind and heart out of grief for a little while.
As you can see from this posting, my experience with the wall of resistance was not terminal. Your times of resistance are bound to come and go too. I know you have the courage to ride through them and continue your healing journey.
With love and respect,